My First Triathlon:Two flat tires, hit by a car, and dead last. BEST FEELING EVER.

My First Triathlon:Two flat tires, hit by a car, and dead last. BEST FEELING EVER. Swim: 25% freestyle swim (you know that arm over arm awesomeness elites do) 75% backstroke (my strong stroke, I swam this on my HS team) stayed to the way outside so I wouldn't hit anyone. Worked out well. Finished Swim strong and ready to bike. Bike: Holy hell. I did out the map on Mapmyrun.com with where my "incidents" happened here is the run down. Rode 1.95 miles and just before the first hill on Jordan St my back tire went completely flat. Popped the tube. Decided "screw it, I can turn this into a duathon and I'll swim and RUN a half marathon." (aka I'll just run the bike portion with my bike) Started running with flat back tire on bike guiding bike with one hand while I ran 2.63 miles. At that point FINALLY a Y van came by and helped me change the tire. Mary (#97) had given me everything in her pack when she rode by saying she didnt' know HOW to change the tire but once I found a Y member they might. My heroes in the van helped me patch the tire....which then blew once we inflated it on the bike, remove the tire again and replace the tube completely with one a passing cyclist (NOT IN OUR RACE) gave me when they saw my bike upside down on the side of the road being repaired. Get that settled start riding again. Ride 2 miles and a mini van almost hits me when she makes an illegal UTURN in the middle of the street. She was coming against me on the left and cut her wheel to change directions. When she was on the right side of the street she cut me off so badly I had to slam on my brakes to a complete stop. She never acknowledged me yelling...may have been that she was busy on her cell phone. .25 miles later this SAME GIRL cuts a quick right into a driveway using NO signal or brakes and collided with me, knocking my bike over and throwing me thankfully from my bike onto grass. Still on her cell phone. I left a hefty dent in her van. Her "mom/aunt" person comes and says she needs my info for insurance and that I am 50% at fault. At this point I ignore her lack of compassion for human life and ask the tractor trailor that was behind me to please call the police and "notify the YMCA Triathlon in bright yellow shirts that they have a rider down". They do so. While I wait I sit on the curb sobbing. Asshat on the cell phone and her grown up do not offer me water, or ask if I am ok just state that I am 50% at fault again. SAME Y van that helped me with the tires returns to assess me, my bike, and pretty much tell the lady and her young friend (maybe 19yrs old) that cyclists have the right of way, blinds spot or not she was at fault for assault with a deadly weapon. (I WANTED TO CHEER BUT I WAS TOO BUSY TRYING TO COMPOSE MYSELF AND STOP SOBBING). Joe Halus, the Y employee, now urges me to please get in the Y van and abort the race. I refuse, He repeats himself holding my shaking hands. I cry at him and say "I am committed to finishing this." He says ok he will ride ahead and make sure the water stays open and that they don't take down the finish sign. I start pedaling again. I make it back to T2 (which is mostly disassembled). Put down the bike and head for the run chute. Run: People cheer me on to the run. My most amazing BFF Sara and my husband Ben are there now. He runs with me a bit to ask what the hell happened and why am I so behind. When I tell him he throws his shoes off and says he will run the 5k portion with me barefoot and in his swim trunks. And he does. Faithfully. Finished in 2:34ish. I am unstoppable. I am a triathlete. I got to set an AMAZING example for my almost 8 year old son. That no matter what, when it is hard, and when you are last, and when you want to give up because you keep trying and it keeps not working......you still do not quit. You finish what you start, and you be proud of what you do. THAT was what today really gave me. He asked me "mom you were last, like last last, why are you so happy?" I said, "because I didn't give up. It was hard, and I was last but I didn't give up. So I won anyway." HUGE LIFE ALTERING THING FOR MY SON TO LEARN. I can not say it enough. My two young daughters, they may not remember, but he will. — feeling determined.

Day 19

So I am 19 days into my "reboot". I have ran pretty consistently increasing my speed work on the dreadmill, I am eating healthy, with only TWO exceptions in sugary snacks (Snickers candy-bar and two bowls of Lucky Charms) in 19 days. I am down 4 pounds. I wish for all this sacrificing of my favorite high sugar high carb snacks I had a bigger number there but I'll take it, 4 pounds is 4 pounds. Today I started the Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred. 30 days of a 20 minutes exercise every day. Sounded a little too easy....then I did day one today and sweat through my clothes. You can learn more about it here: http://www.ehow.com/how_5363883_do-jillian-michaels-day-shred.html And if you dare try level one here: GOOD LUCK! Current Weight 135

February Reboot

Last weekend I took part in the Landmark Forum. It literally changed my life. It is hard to describe 39 hours worth of work on yourself in 3 days and one evening in a 5 minute conversation or even a blogpost. The best way I have to describe it is I was given a spam filter for my brain. I am at peace. I am calm. I really do "get it". I am excited for my life for the first time in a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOng time AND Ben has seen such a transformation in me in 3 days that he has registered for the Landmark Forum in Boston in March. I took a stand for him and told him that I thought he could get a lot of benefit out of the course as well, even though everyone gets something different, and not exactly what they *thought* they were going to get. Amazing breakthroughs happened in my life last weekend. With my mother, my sister, and my husband. My friend Danielle was the one who took a stand for me and introduced me to Landmark, I will be thankful to her till the day I die. Life. Altering. So in creating a new possibility for myself to be brave, happy, and complete I decided to start a "reboot" so to say in February. I make a list of things I am going to get done each day and I actually do all of them. To be a woman of my word with integrity. To be ON TIME. To commit to myself and be authentic with everyone I come in contact with. Starting today, February 1st I declared a month straight of healthy eating, daily exercise and 8 hours of sleep every night. I am curious to see where this takes me. Starting weight 139.0 on my digital scale.

Dunkin Saga

So, things have happened at what feels like a rapid pace since Christmas. I will insert some "back blogs" with pictures soon of Christmas and a few other things most likely tonight or tomorrow. But onto the Dunkin Saga...

January 1st I was promoted after 5 weeks of employement from Crew to Management at Dunkin. I was asked to manage the store inside the Seekonk Walmart. Excited at first over the pay increase, benefits, and the full time status of 40 paid hours I accepted before I KNEW KNEW all the nitty gritty details...like the exact pay increase. They got me for a cheap $9/hour because they could, and because I was promised the big homestore and more money with what would be the expected in "about 3 months" once I learned the ropes at the smaller store. I was fed this awesome string of bullshit about how the team was going to shift around and where everyone would be by Spring and trusted them hook line and sinker. I mean, why wouldn't I? They seemed like a stand up franchise/GM. After all, they out of nowhere bought my family a Christmas tree and all its trimmings this year, even delivered everything as a surprise, once they caught wind that I had three kids and our lack of tree.

But here we are, about a week into March I realized I was not being moved. I mentioned a few times to my boss that I needed more money to stay on as we had discussed. No can do, he says; "me too, believe me". So Ben starts looking for full time day work. And he gets a break, a big break, a career break. We discuss it. He takes the job and I explain to my boss that with no raise, no benefits (vacation, health insurance, anything) I have to do what is right for my family and step down/switch to nights so that I can be home during the day so that my husband can take this opportunity. He says, "absolutely you need to do whats right for your family. I will see what we can do about keeping you on as management here at night instead, but I have to run it by Charlie (the head franchisee)." No biggie right? I gave him 2.5 weeks notice. So...the monday before my last day I mention if he needs help with the schedule or anything for staffing the following week? I ask if he needs me to come in everynight next week to do the books? I ask what my schedule might be? I ask if I am still management? I ask if I'm being moved to a new store? And I ask if he knows what is going on? Has he ordered the change in the donut/bagel case as required by Dunkin Brands so its here as my first day NOT on the schedule is actually the first day of the new menu rollout (window 4). Has he talked to Charlie? This goes on everyday for 5 days....with nothing but vague answers and "I'm working on it" responses. My last day of work was April 1st....which I came in a worked to help my boss out because he misscheduled someone to work who had requested it off months ago...and it was approved and on the approved days off file he has me keep.

It is now April 8th. I have not worked in a week. I have no schedule. I still haven't heard from my boss nor has he returned my phone calls or texts. Except for yesterday when one of my former employees asked if I could work next Saturday. So I am now scheduled for Saturday the 14th from 9am-4pm. Even though I said I could only work till 3 on the weekends. So....let me get this straight, I go from being one of your "aces" to being forgotten about and given 8 hours of work in 14 days.

I am THIS close to saying, I appreciate everything you have done for my family. But I need to have a steady income and I feel like this is completely unfair and unprofessional given the notice I have provided and the work I have done.

But I won't....yet.

Drained

I feel so completely drained. I haven't been able to do anything lately. Work, take care of kids, clean house, do laundry, sleep, get up, work, take care of kids, clean house, do laundry, sleep, get up, work, take care of kids, clean house, do laundry....

I miss my girlfriends. I miss going out with my husband. I miss having time to myself.

I do love my new job at DD's and I LOVE that I know there is additional money coming into the house to help tackle the bills now that I'm there its just so hard to find a balance. I need to get a gym membership asap or I'm going to go insane from not running. That is my outlet. I NEED to run. Its so therapeutic. And I feel like a million buck afterwards.

I am going to start The Happiness Project on the first of the year. I've had the book since March but have literally been waiting for the New Year to start it. And I need to finish my Dr. Phil book (that man is a genius).

I felt so rejuvenated after my six day stay at Butler Campus last month. Group therapy with Maria, Eric and Matt was the biggest help and I learned things about myself and my situation that I don't think I would have ever figured out on my own. I got a new psychiatrist, new medication (really the old stuff I stopped taking but a new dosage), and a therapist that I meet in the new year. Things are better at home, mostly because I have a new skill set on how to handle life here and Ben and I are getting back on track as well. Our trip to VT and the renewal of our vows was the catalyst in that case.

Off to go attack the laundry...and dishes...and then sleep, get up, work, take care of the kids.......

129.8

That's right! I'm UNDER 130lbs!

*Happy Dance*

Yay for running, eating right, and a few boxing classes!

Walmart Wednesday

My bestie Sara has a blog/link/jump thing that she does that's called Target Tuesday.

I, am a regular at Walmart so I thought I would counter that with a Walmart Wednesday.

This is a fabulous store. Mind you the quality is not so hot, but when you are a family of five that blows through clothes and necessities like wildfire spreads in California you gotta do what you gotta do. Not to mention any place with cheap groceries, baby products, health and beauty, a pharmacy, nail salon and anything else you can imagine all under one roof that saves me from loading and unloading a kindergartener, a toddler, a baby and a monster double stroller in and out of a corolla gets my vote. So without further ado...the purchases of fabulosity this week are:


You won't see anything cause my stupid computer freezes everytime I try to upload a photo now.

Awesome.

It was a kick ass sweater and scarf.

Sorry you missed it.